The One is a Choice, Not a Destination – Here’s Why


‘Love is native to our being. When you are in love with a man or woman, the love you feel does not come from him or her; it is the love flowing from your own heart that you feel. Your partner is simply giving you an excuse to love.’

David Deida


Don’t Restrict Yourself to One – The Universe Hasn’t

I will be bold and state that I do not believe there is ‘the One’.

It was a romantic idea I liked for a long time but I soon stood back and took in the full view of the world.

We all met the ‘One’ in different people at different times in our life.

And we are not always to be in a relationship either.

Some of the most important lessons in life come when we are single.

This big desire for a ‘One’ comes from a search for completeness. The truth is you complete you.

The more you focus on filling your own cup the more fulfilled you will feel. When you begin to treat yourself with all the worth you deserve magical things happen. When you take the time to get you right. When you make the time to eat well, exercise, meditate, relax and be creative. When you become the you, you have known was there deep down inside, when you bring forth all that you have wanted for yourself but haven’t made time for.

And when you are there, in that space of completeness in yourself, you may seek to find someone special to share the journey with. And if you find someone, if that is what you seek, that is a gift, to find what you seek.

I have met great love and he was ‘the one’ for me for that time. It sadly didn’t work out but I know for my growth and the support it was right for us, until one day it wasn’t. There have been ‘Ones’ that weren’t so right for me either, but they taught me so many things about myself I needed to grow from.

Every ‘One’ has encouraged growth.
Every ‘One’ has revealed more me, in time.

I believe we can end up with a great match that can make us feel magical.
But we can also choose to settle in a match that isn’t quite right for us.

Each ‘One’ has its own beauty, each ‘One,’ as long as it is healthy and respectful, should be celebrated.

Enjoy the search.
Enjoy the ride.
Enjoy each and every person that comes into your life.

We are such amazing creatures. Truly spectacular in our design. Love learning about another every step of the way. Love what day one together teaches you and love what 60 years teaches you, if you find that is a path bestowed upon you.

But love your journey first and foremost.
Love your mistakes. Love the lessons in them – that is a powerful way to own being a human.
Love meeting people.
Love the beauty in a goodbye.
Love missing someone – the pure celebration in them, in that.
Love your growth.
Love each person’s chapter in your life.

But please don’t get bogged down by fairy tales. Sure, there are people who meet their mate and spend their whole lives together. That is beautiful for them, but that isn’t the way we were all made, nor the path we were all laid.

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