Photo by Jorunn Lorenzen
I have heard that everyone you meet will teach you something, and I believe this with my whole heart.
We are all so quick to form our own opinions of the actions taken by others. We are also quick—given half the chance—to share and expect our recommendations to be followed. Here we are with barely a glimpse of the whole situation, yet we feel that ‘our’ recommendation is the best solution.
We are faced with these situations and are confided in on topics that may challenge us at our very core. After all, what do you do if you find out someone is being taken advantage of or in an abusive relationship? What is going on here is so complex that we can never fully understand it. Yet, when our advice falls on deaf ears, we become frustrated and often remark on how foolish the other person is being.
In such situations, we need to think about the best way to be a friend.
Just because you think it is the right time for something to change or for someone to take action, this event will happen on its own clock, not yours.
There comes a time in our lives when we realize that we are probably not making the right decision, but for whatever influential reason, we make it anyway, and we do not want to be told otherwise. At such a time, we do not want to go to a friend who constantly imposes their thoughts, but rather a friend who might not always agree, but regardless, will let it go and just support us in our decision.
Timing is so important in life. There is a right and wrong time for everything. We need to be mindful not to make demands on ourselves or others based on the outcomes that we want, but rather trusting that some things just need to happen when the time is right, if they are indeed to happen at all.
As others confide in us over quarrels within themselves, we need to remember that we are there not to impose our advice, but rather to offer our support.
Listen to the lesson the situation has for you as much as it challenges you—in fact, ‘especially’ if it challenges you.
All relationships must be supportive, even when we think a decision is not right at the time. Give your advice, help the other person mull over their internal challenges and discuss options; but whatever their decision, regardless of whether or not they take your advice, as a true friend, offer your support.