Float by Loosening Your Grip

We panic and grip tighter.

Try to control the situation even more.

Push for an answer.

We demand a response.

Imagine your are in water. You cannot swim. You are paniced, throwing your arms around and kicking violently.

If you only realised you could stop struggling and instead float.

OR

You open your hand and in your palm a small pile of sand is placed. Hand held open, the sand remainds. But you want to make sure you don’t loose any so you tighten your grip and it all slips through your fingers – if you only you’d have kept it open.

Release your control on the ways of the world and let what is yours naturally flow to you and what is not float on by.

When you are feeling vulnerable and scared – you will find that the struggles in life often are moved through with ease moreso when you can stop trying to control and allow what will be to be, and if not, take care of yourself and move on.

Afraid fo the space that a move on may leave – only new dreams and wild adventures and come if there is room for them.

Trust.

Release.

Float.

 

OWN IT – BECOME IT

TaLisa

PS – I have a course for you – check out the intro video here to Choose You – Meditation and Mindfulness Made Easy – then find it on the courses page!

Allowing the Evolution

ALLOW YOUR EVOLUTION

I am here.

But tomorrow I will be somewhere else, someone else.

I will evolve.

I will evolve as a person in looks, in how I think, how I feel, in the work I do.

I don’t know what that will look like.

I don’t know what that will feel like.

But to step into my evolution I must allow it and release all else.

I mustn’t restrict the changes that bubble up within.

I mustn’t fear the unknown of this future rising.

I mustn’t doubt my inner call and guidance.

And I must NOT shy from the work it calls me to do to get there.

I am all I need to be – I need do nothing but take the action that calls me.

 

It isn’t what I do – it is who I am.

 

PS – I’m about to release a course all about this – sign up for the newsletter, top right to get the discount and free offer in the first release of this mega internal work course!

Want to get started now – let’s hook you up with some 1 on 1 coaching.

OWN IT – BECOME IT

Photo:  Jorunn Lorenzen

Rejecting Superwoman – No, I don’t want to do it all

In a day and age when we can do anything and everything we are encouraged to.

We are encouraged to have the education, get a great job, become a mum, go to all the soccer practices, don’t miss a moment in person, captured on video, study some more, stay fit, get out and travel.

We go out and fight for equality, make a stand for what is right in an effort to hold the world together as the caring culture falls apart at the seams, then we come home only to continue leading, holding our selves to account to have a home of care and encouragement as this is the right thing to do and so it must go on our list of required, behaviours and leadership traits in every waking moment.

Oh, and did you fit in there the spiritual retreat, and hire your PT to ensure you remain your best throughout all this and continue chasing your dreams in your spare time.

Well, I think all that noise can piss off – I don’t want it.

Now, I am not saying we shouldn’t make a stand or do or not do any of these examples.

 

But what needs to be said is that trying to do all this is exhausting, wearing us down and stunting our joy.

 

 

The joy that comes from the freedom to explore and chase curiosities – or even have nothing to chase.

The joy from an unplanned day.

The joy in spaces of time and place.

The joy from not having a to-do list that you didn’t get all ticked off so you don’t have the guilt of not getting it all done despite what you did get done.

Sure, I can do it all, but I don’t want to.

 

I want the downtime created by handing over the reigns and maybe not having the most nutritious meal.

I just want to have a Saturday with nothing on so I can fill it with sleeping in, eating breakfast slowly then sip my coffee in the morning sun – with absolutely no pressure.

I want the space in my life to be able to uncoil from all the stress, expectations and demands of the world, and the ones I put on myself.

I don’t want to do it all.

I want to do a couple great things but that is more than enough because I also want space to play and time to ponder.

I acknowledge that my growth, my life and the best future for me will come when I allow it the space to, rather than demand it to with tasks and lists.

 

It is great to know I can do whatever I want – but I don’t want to do it all.

 

I think Superwoman is a great role model for all we can do – but she is better left on the screen for I acknowledge only superhuman powers will enable you to do it all and not break.

And so, with the summer ahead I clear my obligations. I release the reigns and I am sinking into the backseat of life for a while, enjoying the view out the window and letting the warm breeze flow through my hair.

 

A Little Coaching Session

The change of seasons brings about a desire to also shed parts of ourselves and an even bigger desire to step into that space we dreaming of seeing ourselves in.

For some of us that space is about:

  • carrying a sense of peace and presence throughout the day,
  • for others it is finding a way to stick to the health/diet change, some will have a dream that they haven’t been quite able to find the pieces that make it all come to life,
  • some are working at their new business but find they cannot quite picture the longer term direction,
  • and some cannot even put their finger on what that feeling is.

I do the work on this once to twice a year for myself and my business where I immerse myself in my own coaching skills and work through, from the unknowing, clarifying and further refining until BAM – I have my next six months to a year clear and right in front of me for my next step to be taken into.

Whilst it is a little difficult to run through a coaching session with you without your answers, I do have a little self-reflection set of questions that provide some key insights if you really sit with them and let the answer unfold. A neat trick I like to use is to ponder the question before bed and then let my subconscious work on it over the night to a few days.  I find the answer emerges in time or that when I revisit the question a new angle comes to into my conscious mind.

These questions each stand alone. Working on all of them all at once will create a bit of a cloudy mix of emotion inside. Instead pick a key one or two at a time to sit with (paired off for you):

What/where are you currently hiding?
What are you losing sight of?

What support do you need right now? How can you get it/ask for it?
What shouldn’t you tolerate, but maybe do? Why?

I really miss…
I want to create …

An answer I am waiting for is…
When I am the situation of … I feel out of alignment with my true self.

What am I escaping…
I am not quite ready to deal with …

My body is craving …
My soul is craving…

It is deep work to come face to face with spaces of ourself we have lost touch with over the chaos of everyday life.  It is amazing of you to take the time to really get back in touch with yourself.

If you are looking to go deep and clarify, check out the Coaching Page for more info.

 

 

 

How Balance in Life is About Boxes

 

The science shows how multitasking isn’t really a thing. Our brains switch quickly from one task to another, yet we are never simultaneously thinking about two separate things at the exact same moment.

So it doesn’t make sense to try to live like we are able to multitask.

Leading a more balanced life isn’t about having two items on the same scale and weighing them equally. It is about only having one item on the scale and allowing it to weigh in fully.

 

I describe this with the metaphor of boxes. Think of all the important areas of your life, like work, family, personal goals, etc, each as their own box. In the ‘family box’ are all the activities that are required for a good, healthy family life.

The key is only having one box open at a time to play in fully and recognising you need to carefully put the lid on one box and store it before pulling out and opening the next.

 

This mental act of putting the box away signifies the space between, also termed the ‘third space’ by Dr Adam Fraser. It is the space between two different tasks/areas of your life, where you reset yourself. In this space between you release all that was going on with the first box, into that box and close the lid. Then ready to be fully present you can open your next box.

I have found and have coached people in using this tool which has proved extremely helpful in stressful situations.  When working on the stressful item, open the box and be fully in that box working on the task to effectively work through it, but when it is time to put it away pack it up fully so you don’t take it with you into other areas of your life.

 

Another consideration is how often each box is coming out. 

It isn’t healthy to spend most of your time in the ‘online world box’ and only short amounts in the ‘sleep box’. Nor can you spend all your time in the ‘work box’ and little in the ‘family box’.

But special projects do come along in life and one box may be out more often than the others for a while. As long as it is balanced in the long run this is healthy.  For example, you may have a large work or personal project you are pouring yourself into for a couple months. But in doing so you know you will dedicate more time to the family later such as scheduling a vacation.

 

To be mindful, present and find more simplicity in these crazy times:

Keep one box open at a time.

Mentally put away the box before opening the next.

Ensure over the medium to longer term all boxes are opened regularly.

 

 

P.S. If you want a ‘social media box’ have one but don’t take it to dinner with you and open it at the table.

1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 21 |